oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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