plz talk dirty to me
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
