D3 body, D1 cock
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
You left your phone here
Wait...
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