i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
