I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
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