Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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