When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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