We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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