Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize