At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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