Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I just found puke in my bra..
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
