We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
