I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize