I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I think i got beer on your cat.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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