Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
