I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
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Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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