She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
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i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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