THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
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