you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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