I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
