I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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