I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Moan for me like Helen Keller
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
