piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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