she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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