Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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