it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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