I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
