I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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