is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
