I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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