Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize