Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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