I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
