Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
