She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
