i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
