My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
