I'm gonna have a badass scar
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Terrible idea I love it
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
