I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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