it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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