Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
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