I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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