So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
