How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize