I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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