Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Randomize
