when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
