Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
