I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I just gargled with NyQuil
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
