Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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