I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
