Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
