everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
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I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
oh god was she eating orange peels again
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
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I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
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